My Little Fighter

Today I went to a workshop on grief and mourning and caregiving. Jim and I went last night too. It was hosted by Memorial Hospital in South Bend and Alan Wolfelt (www.centerforloss.com) was the speaker. I would encourage anyone who is interested in understanding the world of grief and mourning due to the loss of a loved one to attend one of Alan's workshops. It was incredibly helpful and validating. It's good to know that the processes and work we're trying to do seems to be what we're supposed to be doing.

I also had a chance to talk with one of Connor's nurses from the Memorial NICU; Kim. All the NICU nurses were awesome and it was really great to talk with her. Kim encouraged us to take pictures and hold Connor as much as possible while we were there. She asked me how I was doing and I said we're doing all right (my usual answer). Then she made me so sappy (Dr. Wolfelt states...SAPPY is sad and happy at the same time). She told me that Connor was a true fighter and so strong! She bonded with him and was really rooting for him. She said that it was all Connor and his strength and will during the times that he didn't seize and it was our strength through him. Kim said that we did everything we were supposed to...that we are wonderful parents and stayed by his side and hold him. She said we are fighters.

I wonder about the nurses and staff at the NICU and whether they remember us and Connor. Kim did. I showed her the picture of Connor from NILMDTS. She really liked it and remembered his cute lips! We talked about how beautiful he was and she rememembered his big hands and feet! We were both crying. It was so nice to be able to see one of Connor's nurses. Someone who was there and was able to tell me that Connor was a fighter and was strong and such a beautiful, awesome boy! I love you, Connor...my little fighter!